A bitterSWEET SIXTEEN

It’s almost sudden the way our kids grow up. It’s similar to how the seasons change so quickly. How summer charges in with all its heat and force and you find yourself wishing for the crazy spring weather to return. The difference is, spring will be back while our kids just keep moving on.

I don’t know the exact moment when Victoria became a young woman, but it is certainly here. It may have been the first time she spent the day away from me and didn't call home to say hello or the time she went to camp for an entire week. I remember leaving her there and being so nervous for her and then not being able to get back fast enough at the end of the week, only to see that she was more interested in giving her friends a goodbye hug, than she was in giving her mother a hello hug. I remember the sadness of no longer feeling needed mixed with pride and a confirmation that as parents, we were doing something right.

I can remember standing outside her preschool trying to find an open window to peer into just to make sure she was okay. There is a fine line between allowing her to grow up and wanting her to. The only problem is that no matter how I feel – she will grow up. Not in spite of me; but despite me.

Today's teens have so many responsibilities - homework, expectations and peer pressure to burden their days and life is a series of events that make up a day. As I wake her up each morning I miss the little bouncy girl she once was. I miss our long walks, playdates with friends and just sitting on the couch reading her a book until she fell asleep. I miss the way she used to rush into my arms for a big hug and how she would carry that silly little blanket everywhere. Instead, I drop her off at school, parties, a friends and watch her her rush off barely looking back.

Her crazy schedule becomes my crazy schedule and when our times and dates conflict, for a few minutes I am irritated – distracted by the amount of things I now have on my plate and then I remember what little time I have left with her. Soon she will be driving, heading off to college and where ever else her path will take her and I wonder how it all happened so fast. I have no doubt I will miss this craziness. So, for now I will enjoy it, because the evolution of life is in constant motion and whether I like it or not, my baby is most definitely growing up.

Happy Birthday Victoria!